flowersIntheWindow

Monday, May 29, 2006,7:30 PM

well not sure if the weekend had been a blast...if u ask me...parents were outta town and me other lads are pretty much doin about nuting ...so leavin me to my sanctuary and pretty much by myself but engulfed still with countless and endless chores at home no thanks to my useless ever so endearing lads of mine... So unoe wot I mean... but on top of all the shits tat indeed happened... Strange enuf had a blast of a time with my bestfren...laughin bout nuting... contributing relentless thots and obviously ideas and personal experiences I must say to the ever best selling book of "why men lie and women cry"...by allan & babara pease...well ave to confess dat experiences are similar and almost relatively true...its like a spiritual connection all of a sudden….ha hah haahah

aside all of dat ...It made me realize and understand my other one better well perhaps…I dunno...Too much dwellin in my thots...I reckon no thanks to the contribution of a bad weekend eh?

Aving one of those days...where...as usual...Im lookin for sum passion in life wich I cant seem to find even at this moment... Not my family nor my job...Nuting ...na-ah ... Zilt if u ask me ... resulting in mua wakin up everyday to a void day in and day out... lethargy takin up mostly and feelin wasted is what makes up almost all of my emotions…..not very healthy for a gerl whos supposed to be euphoric bout her oncumin big day.. its like preparation is makin minor progress … movin at snail pace though its just 6 mths away ...hmmmm bt as usual the onli medium for me to relay to obviously ave a lot in his hand I must say...forgetbout it ... If u ask me ...im getting tired of myself too ...well im gone too

Monday, May 22, 2006,7:01 PM

sometimes my life presents me with a strings of events dat takes on my one after another with never ending issues to touch on...... well time takes on ur life as much too...unknowingly.....its almost 5more months to the big day and i cant help but wonder bout this major steep step i be undertakin in months to cum...the risks, the commitment .... its impractically foolish to believe that marriage is an no brainner task to relinquish..... the thought of is...as exciting as it is.... is causing sum kinda apprehension .... if u ask me , you know....... im feelin at my pits...couldnt figure the least wot else to look out for and move towards......

everytin seem to be glossy blurrish image for me to look for .......

Wednesday, May 17, 2006,9:06 PM

if stunnin isnt the werd ... den i cant seem to fit the perfect vocab to it.....my dearest cuz settled down last weekend.....well anyways babes hope your blessed with boundless of joy and luv in your life to come ..... be strong and ave faith in all u do aite, will miz u yah

Tuesday, May 09, 2006,6:31 PM

Sumtyms it feels lyk as if der isn't enuf in my life to add on to the many cliche issues tat coulda happen to any other 23 (almost 23) year olds….i beg to differ, mind u, im exhausted and im amaze by the very fact tat Ive yet to even cum close to breakin down , u noe?... Ppl ard u whom u seeked in ur ups and downs sumtimes seems to fail u... Dun let me get started on the obvious souls dat are attached to u genetically yet the least concern of these issues dat seem to trouble u ... im amazed by the fact tat there are ppl who lived through their lives with so much conviction dat I myself cant simply bring myself to… im ashamed of myself... I cant even seem to decide if I wanna pursue the one ting I dreamed bout doin all my life...Just bcoz sumone ego-centric being ave obviously been challenged and to accept defeat would only mean swallowing my bloody pride yet on the contrary given the opportunity to pursue for a dream I longed...Queer! Irony!

This is the major irony of my life ... this perpetual idiosyncrasies ave to take an exit real soon before I lose my sanity to life itself. Sheez I could not even recall the countless times Ive claimed to be burned out ….

Im just weary dame...feels like 1001 tings just hit u strait on and ur left grappling for space(and air!) to tink bout wot u wanna do next , u noe?

*she cried herself to sleep, she close her eyes, and when she wakes up, its morning.......